What Being a Full-Spectrum Companion Means to Me

My Journey Into Birth Work

I have worked with youth and families for most of my life. When I was in middle school, a friend and I started a business called “mothers’ helpers” (hello, gender norms!); a little too young to officially babysit, we took care of kids so that parents could have free time to work or rest in the home. Since then, I have been a classroom teacher, a nanny, a household manager, a tutor, and a life coach. And less formally, I have shown up for friends and family near and far, offering support and care in ways they’ve needed it.

In June 2019, I supported my sister through her first birth. As I witnessed my newest nibling enter the world, making my sister and brother-in-law parents, my heart and life and work heart expanded.

I immediately decided that I was going to become a birth companion. (I use the word “companion” not “doula” and here’s why.)

Beyond Birth

Attending this first birth, witnessing and supporting my sister’s process, opened me up to birth work in a new and profound way. As I began researching, I quickly realized that my initial understanding of birth work was quite narrow.

Birth work is reproductive justice work and, “SisterSong defines Reproductive Justice as the human right to maintain personal bodily autonomy, have children, not have children, and parent the children we have in safe and sustainable communities.” 

Here’s what I’ve quickly come to learn and feel in my bones:

Birth work is community work. It is care work. It is advocacy work. It is anti-oppression work. It is disruptor work.

It is witnessing. It is caring for the humanity of all people. It is learning and unlearning. It is beyond the systems. It is trauma-aware. It honors the individual AND the collective. It is a full-body experience. It is queering it all up.

Birth work seeks to create a reality that aligns with our highest visions for our Earth and all of the beings we cohabitate with.

What Full-Spectrum Means to Me

So, as all of these lights bulbs were going off, I realized that full-spectrum work is where and how I want to serve. Furthermore, I saw my values and beliefs reflected back to me by birth work-- through the elders, educators, birthing people, and thought leaders who have come before me.

I also saw myself reflected back-- the many roles I have played in this lifetime, the me that is still unfolding and healing and growing. While I arrived at this work formally in my mid-30s, I can see how my whole life has prepared me for this role of witnessing and supporting people in their humanness and through their reproductive experiences.

Additionally, along this journey, I have re-remembered how powerful it is to be seen and held during life’s transitions. When I found birth work, I also found and/or rediscovered new parts of myself. I came out as pansexual and then the concept of gender blew my damn mind; I use she/they pronouns now-- please and thank you. I got in touch with my generosity and heart  in new ways and found new edges and boundaries. I started talking about and actually practicing anti-capitalism in my businesses and life. And all of this beautiful and difficult transformation has been supported by Reproductive Justice, both directly and indirectly.

Community is Crucial

I am still very much learning how to engage in the inner AND outer work that is required for the collective to achieve reproductive justice, and I always will be. I’m writing this piece and living my life as a white, cis-socialized, able-bodied, hetero-presenting, neurodivergent and mentally ill, self-employed, middle-class person. I have been afforded privileges that many communities and folks are not. Unlearning the myths of white supremacy, capitalism, and the patriarchy is lifetime work, and, again, it is at the core of my work as a full-spectrum companion.

There are so many people I am grateful and honored to learn from in the Reproductive Justice space. These are just *some* of the folks in my immediate birth work lineage who inspire me: Sabia Wade, founder of BADT, king yaa (shout out to king for helping me own the term “companion”), Eri Guajardo Johnson, Jenna “JB” Brown, Melinda Morales and the team at Project Teen Birth, and Erika Davis.

Additionally, the 1:1 relationships I am building with other birth workers, friends, and colleagues are invaluable. Knowing that I can reach out to folks for referrals or resource ideas, to process with, to help me check my biases or assumptions, and inspire me in being inclusive and justice-focused, and so on. These texts and calls have been instrumental in my journey, and there are too many of you to name here. Thank you; I love you!

Being a full-spectrum companion is quite literally a full-spectrum experience. It’s all about the nuance and the complexities of being a human who witnesses and is witnessed. So, just know, if you decide to embark on this journey, you aren’t going to simply walk out with a new certification. You, too, will learn new and deeper parts of yourself as you expand your understanding of birth work and the world. 

Courtney (she/they) is a witness, space-holder, supporter, and caregiver for families of all types and in all stages. She has served youth and their families since 2008. Courtney is passionate about honoring life’s transitions, and she believes that all birthing people deserve compassionate, steady, and informed support throughout their unique reproductive journeys. As a full-spectrum companion, Courtney is proud to elevate the voices and needs of each client she has the honor of serving. She is dedicated to inclusive, anti-oppressive work both in her personal and professional relationships and in the systems she lives and works in.

https://companioncourtney.com/

https://www.instagram.com/companioncourtney/